05.28.12
It’s finally kind of hitting me that I am actually going to leave in a few months, not just for a few weeks, but for the next four years.
I was so excited before, I couldn’t wait to get out of Calgary and start a new life, meet new people, be whoever I wanted to be and ultimatley begin with a new fresh start. I was excited to meet people I had never known before, make new friends and become the person I want to be for the rest of my life.
Is it just me or does that not sound absolutley terrifying?
Looking back on what I was excited about only a few months ago now makes me absolutley terrified. Questions start running through my head like;
What if I get homesick?
What if I have trouble making friends?
What if, when I come back to Calgary, things are completely different?
That last one is what haunts me the most. You know when friends move away, and you always say that you will keep in touch, but when you actually move away things are just… different.
I don’t want that to be my life, especially because my friends from Calgary are the people I love the most, and who have made me into the person I am today. It absolutley breaks my heart in half to think that things could change between us. It makes me so sick to my stomache that I don’t even want to think about it.
I know that moving away for a little while and going to school will be good for me, and ultimatley it is one step closer to achieving what I want in life, my dreams. It’s just that, right now, I cannot imagine living without my friends by my side.
I know many more tears will be shed, but it just seems to get harder and harder to wrap my head around the fact that, in a few months, we will all be saying goodbye.
